Question:
Do you think that those who sterotype?
2009-03-06 11:03:59 UTC
foster or adopted children (or anyone who has to do with adoption for that matter) do it to make their lives more cushy and safer?

I believe people who stereotype are like school yard bullies who do it because of their own struggles and insecurities?
Twenty answers:
MamaKate
2009-03-08 14:39:09 UTC
Dear MTFC,



My best guess is simply that:



"It is easy to dehumanize someone you don't know."



Since stereotypes are never really accurate, as they reduce a person to one aspect of the human experience rather than view them as an individual, they are a way of reducing the person they are used on to a "less than human" status in the eyes of others.



There are a million reasons people do it but the most common, in my opinion, is insecurity followed closely by ignorance (fear), on the part of the person doing the stereotyping. Most secure, intelligent people I know do not feel the need to reduce others to on facet of their personality, appearance or life experience.
AleeFrank
2009-03-06 11:10:21 UTC
I can only imagine that is what they are doing... I personally have never encountered anyone stereotypes or bullying adopted or fostered children while I was in grad school. Thankfully, it must not be too common. I think that those who do bully for that are just trying to make their lives seem better by others "misfortune." Although, I don't necessarily consider it a misfortune. Hope I helped.



~AleeFrank
Kami
2009-03-06 11:06:52 UTC
Stereotypes exist whether people want to admit it or not. Assuming someone fits one without knowing really is where the trouble starts. I usually keep my inferences to myself. If someone feels the need to be vocal and insulting about it, you can say it comes from some sort of insecurity but other than that, I believe stereotypes do exist.
ballerartist
2009-03-06 11:08:42 UTC
A lot of stereotypes hold some sort of relevance. That's how they became stereotypes in the first place. I'm not saying it's right. Also, I believe that people with low self esteems are the ones that pick on other people.
?
2009-03-06 11:33:54 UTC
People stereotype because it's efficient. It saves the bother of assessing justice in a more practical and sane way.



Think about it. Poor people get taken into the woods and shot all the time in the USA. Sooner or later the word got out that this country was never all that safe a place to live and that it's getting worse by the minute (not enough Marines ~ my guess).



So, in order to continue to be lazy (and lacking the good sense to join the Marines) bigots tend to want an easy way of determining friend from foe.



It's not merely cowardice, it's also extreme laziness that drives bigotry.



I once had a medical condition that changed, temporarily, my skin color. I'd gotten a bit of snow burn (or frost bite if you will) over about 100% of my body.



I was trying to save some people after a plane crash... but that's too long a story... got into it with some outlaws hiding in the woods on the hike to civilization and was shot and passed out in the snow for awhile...



Anyway, when I got back to civilization after saving the day I was shot by bigots for speaking to a white woman.



You see, I was taken to the hospital white, turned blue-black and was assumed to be a "changeling" ~ a person was assumd stolen from the hospital and I was assumd left in his place. No way the hero turns black.



So, they "placed me ith a black family".



And they went for a visit down south.



Literally, I was fish out of water.

I even talked "like a darn yankee $%&@#".



It's not only that they felt they were in a "fight" with militant people of color and were terrified. They were also far too lazy to even find out anything about me.



The black fellows were nice; "my own" tossed me gunshot into the river.



After I "turned white" again, I was placed with first an Irish family (the IRA shot him for accepting an English child after researching and finding out apparently who I was...)



Then I was placed with a German family. Bit by a spider and nearly dieing they blamed the "cruelty of that race" and gave me to some other family... etc.



Bottom line: people are ideally placed with close relatives.



Cause trauma is trauma.



And for pacement purposes, stereotyping is often better than cleaning up the bloody mess after...



But ~ get competant people into office.



Cause one home I went to tried to skin me alive and sell me as "rabbit meat". Conserfatives believe all lies told by ALL conserfatives, even peopl running "adoption agencies" on the cheap that keep no records of where they place every child.



Because on ocassion the Manson family is running the adoption agency ~ and eating those they can't place ~ and selling the excess children as rabbits.



(You really gotta know the difference between a rabbit carcass and a human to tell... apparently.)



No, I'm not kidding about any of this.



In fact, I wasn't even then a child.



I was a veteran pilot returned home with such bad wounds I shrank ~ and looked "childish". I was in fact the pilot of that aircraft that crashed in the first part o this answer.
Garri M
2009-03-06 13:05:43 UTC
Bullying definitely, but not stereotyping. Stereotyping is just a way of the world these days. Everyone thinks they are right and pre-judge people based on their experiences.
?
2016-10-22 03:15:49 UTC
um no. My butch gf has a Schnauzer. and that i've got have been given a tiny mutt dogs. And each physique stay luckily, without frightening dogs. Butch pals i comprehend had a golden retriever and a lab. And one had a husky. those are greater advantageous, athletic dogs. in accordance to endanger that would have some correlation.
Lori A
2009-03-06 12:39:29 UTC
I don't agree. I think they do it because they feel the need to be better than someone else. If they can say to themselves " at least I'm not as bad as so and so" they feel superior, and isn't that the American way? It is their own insecurity that makes them this way but it is also their justification for their own short comings.
melissa_annemarie
2009-03-06 11:12:41 UTC
people who stereotype (which would include all of us) are going with what they know or have been taught.what it has to do with foster or adopted children,same as above,what they know,have been taught or through personal experience.
kateiskate is newly married!
2009-03-06 12:56:04 UTC
I think that stereotypes make people feel better by categorizing people into boxes so that they feel like they are in control of the situation.
fat_anon
2009-03-06 11:11:56 UTC
I agree with you, bullies are bullies because of their own struggles, shames, and insecurities.



Foster kids are ashamed that their biological parents aren't there. They may think people blame them for their parent's actions. Of course, when they get older if the foster/adoptive parents are great to them they are thankful and have a different outlook.
James
2009-03-06 11:08:02 UTC
I don't necessarily think thats true.



Stereotyping is a learned trait, and its done unconciously most of the time, whereas the bully is concious of his bullying.
2009-03-06 11:11:00 UTC
i hate to say it but yea somtimes they do it to make there life like said safer and cushy like u said it





im not saying eveyone tho
2009-03-06 11:09:03 UTC
So... your admitting to being a bully???



I actually believe stereotypes have their place.



Like I believe someone with a gun pointed to my face is going to hurt me.



Doesn't matter who the person is, if there is a gun to my face I think they will hurt me.



I would stereotype a person who is foster care or who is adopted as having bad or deceased parents.



Maybe you should tell us what type of stereotype it is that is bothering you?



If I stereotyped foster children as "kind and loving" would that be a problem for you? Or is there a specific one that is bothering you?



I think your are stereotyping people who stereotype as being bullies. That makes you a person who stereotypes and therefore by your definition a bully. Did you consider that?



----------

Bad choices made her a bad MOTHER then. You are assuming I meant bad person, and I did not. Your right, some kids in foster care or who are adopted may have wonderful living parents. But that generally is not the case, and I stereotype most foster kids as having bad or deceased parents, because it is usually true. The parents could also be alive but in terrible shape through no fault of their own, but that wouldn't be the general case, and wouldn't be how I would assume the situation to be.



Your primary question is why do people stereotype. That is what is listed as the question. The rest is additional information. My response is we stereotype because it makes sense, and that this question in itself is in fact stereotyping.



Many foster kids and adopted kids have personality disorders and behaviour problems. That is why the foster care agencies have so many extra rules about what conditions they live under. Most of them have already been in a bad situation.



I'm sorry if people are making you feel bad about taking in foster kids, and saying they won't thrive and become good people. You should set them straight. Tell them that you and yours will do great. It isn't that you need to remedy the stereotype, you just have to prove them wrong about YOUR FAMILY.
Kaz
2009-03-06 11:08:51 UTC
They don't have an Intelligent, creative and an original thought in their head
love my life
2009-03-06 12:12:24 UTC
I agree. Just like if you give your child up they will have issues all their lives and be damaged, if you don't have a problem with being adopted you are living in a fog, in denial. I think it makes them feel better about themselves. Most who do that don't want to hear any other side of the story.
SJM
2009-03-06 11:11:30 UTC
I think you just managed to stereotype people who stereotype.
2009-03-06 11:35:41 UTC
Do you mean like....my little adoptee was abandoned under a tree, in a box, near a public building.





Yes...I agree in that sense it is for comforting their own conscience.
Frankie
2009-03-06 11:08:50 UTC
thats not true everyone streotypes everyone, all the time. even when we dont mean too.
2009-03-06 11:09:02 UTC
No, they exist cause they are true


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